Your unlimited powers: You are able to create more succes in your life than you can think of!

This is one of the practical and easy-to-use techniques that you can practice in the basic course with amazing results.

What is the result if you can completely crawl into your own feelings? Then completely in the thoughts and feelings of the other? And finally, when you can look at both from a helicopter and see what there is for a relationship between the two?

What types of relationships do you have?



Improve your relations!

What kind of relationships do you have?

It may be that you have love relationships, family relationships, work relations, neighbor relationships, relationships with fellow road users, relationships with people you experience on radio and TV? Anyway, many different types of relations even with yourself!

What kind of thoughts are coming up when you think about your relationship with a partner or your best friend?

1. Write this down in at least 5 lines.

Consider also the relationships with your children, your parents, your brothers or sisters, with uncles, aunts, cousins, friends, working relationships, relationships with your neighbours, with people who have the same sport, hobby or interest.

2. How important are these relationships for you? Write down how you would feel without all these relationships.

The fascinating thing about NLP is that it gives you clarity in how you can deal with relationships and how you can improve them.

How can you improve your relationships? How do you create quality in your life?

Of course it is nice to make others happy with your relationship with him or her, that makes you happy too.

If you are not completely satisfied with a relationship with yourself or with someone else what can you do?

3. Think of a relationship that you would like to improve. Describe the negative and positive aspects of this.

We will now do the exercise with the three observation positions! Find a buddy who can support you and read the instruction below. Take your time.

4. Place three chairs, as shown on the picture.

5. Stick a note with '1', '2' and '3' on each chair with adhesive tape.

6. You sit on chair 1, we call that the 1st position.

You choose an event in which the contact with someone else was less good.
Name the time and place of this event, be specific.
Focus especially on your own feelings.
You start by saying: "I felt ...... ..
Your buddy questions you.
Live in completely, imagine where you were, what you heard, what you thought, what you felt.
As soon as your buddy hears you talking about the other person with a judgment, you stop, you concentrate on your feelings (anger, fear, shame, affection etc. are real feelings).
Your buddy now asks you to give some sincere compliments to yourself. Take at least a few minutes, but no longer than a few minutes.

7. You are now in 2nd position on seat 2.


You talk from the position of the other person.
You live completely in the other person and assume that these positive intentions have / had.
Intentions can be positive even if behavior is judged negatively.
You tell how he / she experienced the event and what he / she expected
Your buddy now asks you to give some sincere compliments to 'yourself' as being the other.
Be sure to take a few minutes, but no longer than a few minutes.

8. You step now on top of the chair 3 in the 3rd position

You look from the top of chair 3 to chair 1 and 2 to the situation of the event as an independent observer.
You dissociate completely.
You have no feelings or judgment about what you have done in position 1 or the other in position 2.
You describe what you see without choosing the feelings of one of them.
You make an analysis and give objective advice to both about how each of them can improve the relationship.

. .
9. You now sit on the seat of the 1st position and check what has changed. Where did you learn the most?

How much more understanding did you get for the other person?

How many options, options do you see for solving problems?

How many compliments on behavior and skill level did you come up with and can you give to the other person?

See also instructions for making compliments on this site.

Realize that having good relationships for the quality of your life is extremely important.